English is not my mother tongue language and I'm basically trying to improve my weakness: writing skill. So i hope you guys can give me positive comments in pointing out my mistakes. >< Thanks a lot!!
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17/07/21.

It is 29 degree celsius outside and 24 degree inside the room. Im laying down on bed with my cousins but i clearly just can not focus on the subject they are discussing about.

I keep thinking about my sadness, it some how stimulating my insecurities.

The hardest thing to me is getting rid of things i used to believe it was mine.

I would never throw something away without considerations. As well as letting go one of my relationship that easy.

I keep reminiscing myself about the good old days i used to have with them and the reason why we became best friends. I used to trust these people unconditionally and willingly.

However, life always has paths, right. They both have lovers and pay attentions to love regularly. And me myself, I'm just lying here, typing about how regretful I am for letting them bothering my feelings that much.

Now i just do not know how to confront them. We used to be extremely closed then suddenly everything changed. I hate being left behind.
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Should i act as if we're still close?
Or can i just look at them then turn away, pretend like we're normal friends?
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Am i annoying?
Why do i let myself down because of them...
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Wow, i acknowledge that if i remain so reminiscent, i will never ever have a chance to escape from this spaceless feelings.
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So i guess i will forget them and focus on good friends I am having at the moment.
This might not be the best way to solve the problem but it is the most effective way to feel happy.
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And to me, happiness is enough.