I've never told you not because I don't trust you, but because I'm scared. I'm scared that if you know, you won't look at me the same way anymore. I'm scared that If you know what's in my mind, you will laugh, you will tell me that it's just a small matter, that it's nothing compared to what you're suffering. On top of that, I'm scared that you won't accept me, the shattered, broken me. So I act like I'm the happiest person in the world, the kindest person in the world. I smile all the time, I listen to each of your stories, I stay beside you through every highs and lows, I give you everything I can give.

Meanwhile, my mind screams for help. I also want you to know, to listen to my stories. I also want to be cared for, to be saved. I also want to show you the marks, the tears, the anger. I also want my problems to be matter, to be something, to be visible.

But I've chosen not to do that.